Traveling with maxwell
Welcome
Our Purpose
If you're anything like me, you're standing at the crossroads of adulthood with your severely autistic child—wondering what the future holds and how to shape it into something meaningful. Their days in school are done and You dream of giving them a safe, joyful life at home, filled with purpose and maybe even a little adventure. But let’s be honest—it’s tough. Travel, crowds, loud noises, and unfamiliar situations can be overwhelming for them… and for you. It’s easy to feel like your own life is on hold. But you’re not alone. We’ve been there too. Our journey with our son Max has been filled with challenges, but also breakthroughs—and recently, some pretty exciting growth. I’m so glad you found your way here. Take a look around—there might be just the insight or encouragement you need today.
How autism entered our lives
Meet Max—our fifth child, our twin B, and our unexpected miracle. Born second in a set of twins, Max entered the world in dramatic fashion. A sudden cord prolapse led to what the doctor called a “house-on-fire delivery.” It was exactly that urgent—Max had just five minutes to be born safely via emergency C-section. We didn't realize it at the time, but that intense start to life would only be the beginning of Max's extraordinary journey.
As a baby, Max didn’t raise any red flags. He reached most of his milestones within the expected range, though he took his first steps a bit later at 15 months. Still, something about Max felt different. While other toddlers busied themselves with toys, Max was captivated by books—specifically, dictionaries and encyclopedias. He would sit quietly, flipping page after page with laser focus, only to start all over again when he reached the end. It was mesmerizing to watch. But deep inside, I began to wonder.
One day, a friend mentioned an online autism screening quiz. As I clicked through the questions, tears welled up and spilled down my cheeks—I knew. Those words on the screen were painting a picture of Max.
At age three, we made the trip to the Child Development and Rehabilitation Center (CDRC) in Eugene, Oregon, for a full evaluation. The diagnosis: autism spectrum disorder and intellectual disability. It was a moment of clarity that brought both relief and heartbreak.
Max is one of those rare souls who can be both a mystery and a masterpiece. He’s incredibly sweet and pure-hearted, yet his meltdowns are intense and overwhelming. He speaks in short, functional phrases—“conversationally non-verbal,” as I like to put it. Ask him, “Max, how was school?” and he’ll simply echo back, “School.”
Over the years, our family has learned so much from Max—about patience, communication, and unconditional love. We’ve developed a toolkit of strategies to support him, and while I won’t overwhelm you with every detail, I hope to share a few things we’ve learned in the hopes they might help someone else walking a similar path.
Traveling Challenges
There was a time we truly believed traveling with Max would never be possible. When he was six, we attempted a short trip to the Oregon coast for our oldest son’s state Little League tournament. What was supposed to be a family memory in the making turned into a complete disaster. Being away from his familiar space sent Max into sensory overload. By midnight, he was bouncing on my bed, wide awake and completely dysregulated. I ended up spending most of the tournament in our 12-passenger van, trying to comfort a terrified, overwhelmed little boy—dodging scratches and tears, watching him spiral into self-harm. It was heartbreaking. After that, we stopped trying. For the next decade, we split up for family trips or had someone stay behind with Max. It wasn’t ideal—far from it—but it felt like the only way to protect him, and ourselves, from the trauma of it all.
As Max grew into his teenage years, something began to shift. The meltdowns became less intense, the aggression softened, and the self-injury started to fade. By the time he turned sixteen, with some of our older kids off on their own, we felt a pull to try again. I was petrified. We had made so much progress—what if we lost it all? But my husband gently pushed us forward. We bought a travel trailer, one with a queen bed for us and a separate bunkroom with a door, just for Max—a space that could feel like his own. That small detail made a big difference. It worked. For the first time, we traveled together. It wasn’t just a trip—it was a breakthrough. A step forward not only for Max, but for all of us, and the future we dared to hope for.
The Continuing Journey
With every new step we take—whether it’s trying something new with Max or venturing into the unknown—we pick up little lessons and life hacks that make the next challenge a bit more manageable. This blog is our space to share those hard-earned insights, not just about travel, but about the everyday journey of living alongside a severely autistic adult child. We believe wholeheartedly in Max’s potential, and we’re excited to see how he continues to grow, surprise us, and shape the world around him.
